The grass is always greener
by Out-of-the-inside-out-box
Summary: Not Cartoon or Movie verse What would happen if Lydia and B.J. switched roles? What would happen if, in 24 hours, everything became upside down, in both worlds? What if... This is what would happen.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note:** Ok, so this might be a really odd story, might not succeed, might be the worst story ever, but damned if I let it stay in my head. This has been bugging me for the past whatever, when I should be working on Lithium and other various things, and I've decided that this has potential. So I'm gonna share with you this little bit my brain has to offer.

It's neither movie or cartoon verse, it's sort of what happens after everything in those verses is said and done. Hope you guys like it, or tolerate it. Tell me what you guys think of it. If not then I doubt I'll have another chapter to this. Kinda surprised that this concept hasn't been put up in our little section of before...

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Beetlejuice. But I do own this concept, if that means anything.

Now onto the first, and possibly only, chapter of:

**The grass is always greener...**

**Chapter 1:** He's out!

---

A hum of welcome for strangers passed along corridors of alleys and hole-in-the-wall places, lighting the air it graced with a sense of calm, despite the sharp glows that flickered in the pits of darkness. They took in the young form, head tucked down and hands deep in pockets as the collar of her long jacket raised protectively against her pail cheeks. Long, inky hair dangled delicately, hiding any malicious intent that may seep through big, brown, hollow eyes.

She was perfect admits the world that sinfully replaced odd beauty long ago in her eyes, a place she had joined, and had yet found a way out. Her hands gripped deep in her pockets, her blood red jacket swishing as it tickled her ankles. A sneer rising to her pail, flawless lips- a tint of blue shining past the painted red.

She was known as Lyondell, to those that she could care less for, and only acknowledging her birthright to certain individuals. That same birthright that she had long since dropped once he was gone from her afterlife.

She hated him for it, for how she left him. She hated those Royals, for taking him from her. She even hated her case worker, who did nothing for the high power she portrayed. She hated herself, for letting him slip so easily.

Because she was weak.

She wasn't weak anymore though- not for the past two hundred and fifty-six years was she weak.

There was a wisp of wind drifting by her ear, almost affectionately, and she sneered even more, her brown eyes filling with annoyance. She looked up sharply, to see a jagged thin doorway smashed between two wide and intimidating storefronts, almost crushing the small, spineless doorway, just because they could. With a flick of her finger, the two storefronts inched to the side, as if big sister came to the rescue. Her eyes flicked to the two stores, and then to the doorway, in perfect working order, not being crushed by the two bruits of stores.

That would change once she was gone though.

There was a threatening tug at the sides of her mouth, but she shook it off and gripped the door knob gentler than she wanted. With willing access, she passed through.

As soon as the intimidated door closed behind her hopelessly, she eyed the room in front of her. A nauseous yellow glow buzzed through the room, bathing everything within its grasp in a puss yellow. The wall paper was pealed, revealing the cement behind it, which was cracked and chipped at because of burst of energy that were not lost on her. She almost smirked in reminiscence, almost.

Her eyes wandered to the rapidly opening and closing door, flattened people with tire tracks thickly imbedded into them passed through it, with paper sticking out of them like needles sticking out of pin cushions, feeling their bored, almost pained, eyes glance at her without a second thought, turning rapidly on their wired tracks into various other doorways, also opening and closing rapidly. She could swear that this place was cooling itself out, makeshift fans churning the stale air around, if there was any air to begin with.

Sure, there might have been oxygen, but only enough for a breather to say its final good-bye to its title.

She looked at the captives, the secretary with only half a body snapping on exposed gum, the other secretary, which as the other half blowing out smoke which had already escaped her a few seconds too late. The second turned to the first, warning that she was going to get gum on her half of their heart again.

She smirked, tolerating, and even liking at some point or another, the twins to the same body. She glanced over at the four beings stuck on the bench for what would seem eternity. They were there the last time she was there at least, which was a good year ago. The shrunken head man, with big bug eyes and a huge body wrapped in detective wear, which made him seem bigger. A female with three fourths of her head blown into a hole, only showing one eye, and a little corner of a smirk sat next to him. She greeted Lyondell with eye contact. Such a hauntingly blue eye, and the rest of her body was in perfect condition.

Last, but not least, two kids that were holding hands. A girl that was five with a boy that was three. The girl had a knife shoved right through her body, right where her heart was, and the boy had two. The worst of it was that they still had so much hope and love in their eyes, despite what had just happened to them. The girl smiled at her. "Hi Miss Lyondell, do you know where our daddy is?" she said, sunshine flowing through her words, and the older woman stiffened.

She sighed, and put a smile to them. "No, but when I do I'll tell ya, ok doll?" she said, and the girl giggled in return. She turned to the two secretaries, without a care in their worlds, and cleared her throat. "Hey Gemini." She said, feeling both sides turn their attentions to the woman in front of them. "You're getting these two in asap, aren't ya?" she asked, a serious tone set in her voice. The one to the right stiffened up, stopping her gum-snapping instantly, eye widening with attention.

"Ya, o'caus." She said an accent gurgling from her divided voice box. The other was not impressed, flicking the hand that held her cigarette in, towards a cracked doorway. Blue-gray smoke billowed out from it, causing anyone but her to worry. "Swee', Juno's wai'n'." The other sounded through the leak of smoke.

She only nodded and walked to the smoky doorway, sending one last reassuring smirk towards the two kids, who returned the gesture.

With a quick knock she was let in with a gravely retort. Lyondell rolled her eyes as she slipped in, trading places with the thick smell of stale tobacco. The office hadn't changed much, not that it ever did. There was just the big wooden desk with a displeased older woman sitting, hands laced together, and sucking in the endless cigarette, the smoke flowing out the hole, dead center in her throat.

"What did you call me here for June? Are we going to have these yearly meetings, to make sure I don't bust his soul out of the Lost Souls Room?" She asked in false amusement, a slight smirk pressing against the corners of her mouth, pulling up a seat that seemed to be pulled out of the wall. She plopped down onto the seat, her thumbs flipping, playing with themselves.

The usually snippety woman was unusually calm, a glare thick in her eyes, but nothing more. Slowly the smirk that the younger woman had faded, until a half hour passed, when the older woman's eyes finally focused, and looked at the person right across from her. "Shut up Deetz." She said sharply, as if the thirty minutes were just thirty seconds. The younger of the two stiffened up at the name, everything stopping.

"What's got your panties in a bunch June?" Lyondell asked, only to get a sharp 'Shut up' in return.

When new smoke had replaced old smoke Juno finally decided to speak up, getting her thoughts together. The younger woman had never seen Juno so shaken before, not to the point of not having her words together at least. It disturbed her, made her dead heart lurch, stomach churning at something about to be said. Juno stared at her, fingers tightening together on the immortal cigarette, finally opening her mouth to speak.

"He escaped the lost soul's room."

She stiffened unnoticeably, her eyes digging into Juno's. She then let out a sharp laugh, as if to calm her own nerves. "Figures a soul that grand couldn't be held to that blasted room, even if he was exorcised."

Juno started to shake, defenses flying up as she stood up and slammed her palms down onto the wood of the desk, her cigarette crumpling a little. "This is serious Deetz!"

"Don't you think I know that?!" She countered, her voice rising slowly. Juno paused, considering the girl in front of her. Considering her deep eyes which held anger and panic. "Don't lecture me on this. Anything else but this, damn it." She said, her defenses coming up, shielding her emotions from her eyes.

Juno sneered lightly, and took a quick swipe of her cigarette, inhaling it deeply. The younger woman just watched. A pause of three breaths allowed the two women to regain themselves, and they returned to their discussion at hand. "Look, Lydia," she noticed the girl stiffened. "I know that, after what happened that this is tough, but for fucks sake, he got out. Grow up." She said gruffly, inhaling another puff.

Jaded eyes studied her. "How long ago?"

Juno paused, cigarette pressed against her lips, considering what she said. Anger flew into her eyes, as she turned to her door. "Marni! Get in here!" She roared out the door, and in an instant the door flew open, as one of the flattened paper pin-cushions flew into the room, almost falling off her railing. With a quick swipe Juno took the thick file that was somehow pinned successfully to her face. Not even taking a look at the rest of her covered head to toe with pinned on files, she waved her hands in dismissal. "Get out of my sight." She sneered, sitting back down as Marni left in the same fashion she came.

Juno then dropped the thick file onto the desk, as one of the legs broke under the weight. With a flick of the hand the table returned to its previous position, not even taking care to fix the leg. With a flip, papers shot out of the file, quickly covering the whole room with a half foot of papers, even sticking to the walls and ceilings and every other odd angle that they could reach. Juno paused, closing her eyes and almost breaking her immortal cigarette in half. Lyondell just smirked in amusement, seeing Juno being covered in a paper-Mache sort of look, while she was perfectly untouched. Then suddenly, all the papers, which had fine, barely readable writing all over them, had stamps of big, red letters. The words even curled around Juno in defiance.

_Suck on this paperwork, you old hag! _Were what the words said and Lydia snickered to herself. She was actually pretty relieved that her old friend still had his ways to imprint on the world around him.

She then noticed as a single paper floated down into Lyondell's hands; a report on the lost soul Beetlejuice. Her eyes widened as she saw when his soul escaped, and a frown was deeply etched into her face.

_Almost 18 years ago…Well shit, she had to find his soul asap. _

She smirked as the woman in front of her shook wildly, hands clutched and shaking above her head, and roared out through the paper.

"_**Beetlejuice!**__"_

_--- _

Well there you have it my darlings, the first chapter. RnR please. _  
_


	2. Live and Let Die

**Author's note:** Holy carpfish, people actually like my story. I keep on getting reviews and favorites to this story, so I got up the ideas and courage to write this chapter. Thanks guys, you're made of awesomesauce, and a bag of chips. Thanks to my reviewers rubydesires (you're like the itch that wont go away in my life, and I love you for that. *hug* ) Katrina Marie Lupin, and WaichiMakkura. You all get awesome cookies, filled with love.

Well this chapter is all about the ghost with the most, not being the ghost with the most. You'll see. I'll probably edit this whole story later on, because it needs character growth, or something of the sort. Grow the characters, and they will seem real. Sorry about the bad writing skills, they need work.

Disclaimer: I do not own Beetlejuice, or the characters that reside in that world.

Anyways, onto another chapter of:

**The Grass is Always Greener...**

**Ch. 2:**Live and Let Die

---

"Haha, Beetlebreath beetlebreath. Stinky dirty beetlebreath."

A group of five boys chanted, shoving around a scruffy, lanky blond with bright green eyes and a black shirt and pants. With a quick shove and toss of catch, one of the boys stepped sideways and faked awe as he watched the blond stumble and almost fall over. The blond stood up and turned, almost falling over again.

"What are we? Middle-schoolers?" The blond scoffed, and then oofed as he caught a bag at his waist, falling over from the force, and landed in a thick mud puddle. The group just laughed, and one of them, the leader with the odd nick name of Scuzzo-sporting a black leather jacket, white shirt, and ripped jeans- walked up to the blond coolly.

"What do you think Beetlebreath?" He then smirked, for a second, before dropping that smirk for a forced frown. He kneeled down in front of the blond, smoothing his hair back and resting his arms on his bent legs. "Dawww, gonna cry to mommy?" he then rocked his hand on his cheek, faking a sobbing sound and looking at the blond sadly.

He got a face full of mud in return.

Scuzzo started to growl as he wiped away the mud. The group of four started to chuckle, and immediately stopped when Scuzzo turned to them. He then turned back to the blond, who was chuckling and doing the same motion as Scuzzo was earlier.

"Aww, big bad gangster gonna cryyyy? Boo hooo." He said, baby talking the infuriated Scuzzo. Scuzzo growled, grabbed the blond by the back of his shirt and pants and picked him up.

"Shut up beetlebrat." He said, walking over to the alley-way, towards one of the dumpsters. "Lardo." He said once, and one of the bigger boys rushed over to the dumpster. Scuzzo grinned maniacly and raised a flailing blond high enough to whisper into his ear.

"Welcome to high school, brat." He said as he threw the blond into the dumpster and grinned as one of his men tossed the bag into the dumpster. With a heavy kick the dumpster started to roll out of the alley, and then picked up speed, rolling down the street. Scuzzo chuckled. "Welcome to Peaceful Pines Beetle."

---

"Oh Betel, look at yerself, ya're covered in grime. And yer clothes-I just washed 'em for ya too." A woman in her mid fifties paced-a rather round looking woman-, was grief stricken over the blond in green and brown grime, sitting in a chair face down.

He just groaned under his breath. "Sorry ma…" he said bitterly, his face smeared away and partially clean. His green eyes were down casted in a sort of shame, as he ignored strong young hands on his shoulders. He ignored the taller man, in his mid twenties, looming over Betel in concern.

The two brothers than turned their eyes to the doting mother, starting to make a pacing crater. "Mother, calm yourself." The older of the two said.

"Donny, why can't your brother be more like you?" Donny's eye's flickered down to Betel, who stiffened and stared at the ground intensely, gripping the under-sides of the chair.

"Well, ma, incase ya didn't notice, I ain't like mister primp and popular over here." Betel said, hiking a thumb over his shoulder. Donny flinched at the waft of decaying diaper. "Incase ya didn't notice I ain't like nobody in this family. I'm not perfect, so stop thinking I will be." He said, standing up.

This stopped the woman in her tracks from the stop. She watched him, and sighed, running a hand over her tight bunned hair. "Alright Betel, calm yerself. Sorry I made such claims." She said, her hands in her standing lap.

Betel looked over his mother, and then sighed, shoulders relaxing, as he sat down. "Right ma…" He then tugged at his shirt, and sniffed it. He flinched a bit. "Woah, I smell like a skunk ran me over…"

She nodded and turned to the door that lead to the back room, calling through it. "Nat! Do you have the tomato bath ready?"

"Bath?! No way in hell!" Betel jumped up and ran to the door, and got close lined by big brother Donny.

Donny sighed, and picked up Betel by the armpits, holding him out arms length. "I'm going to have to take one too at this rate." He groaned and walked into the back room, eyeing a giant wooden tub that normally had grapes in it. He sighed and turned to Nat, their father. A rather tall man who was square-like in appearance. "Father, you're going to clean that out before the grapes come in, right?"

"Depen's on if yer brother cleans up goo' enough er not. Don' wan' him stinkin' up tha whole place now do we?" Nat said, stepping away from the tomato juice filled tub as Donny shook his head. "Exac'ly. Now, Pu' yer brother in tha tub. We'll che' up on him when he's done." He said and wiped his hand proudly, then walked to the front room.

Donny sighed and did as he was told. He stared at Betel in thought. How'd such a bright kid end up being such a trouble maker? The kid was the smartest person he knew, albeit not the most popular or outgoing, but damn bright. Hell, if he tried, he would be done with high school and out of this hick town. But, after the last school…he sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Donny could have stayed back in New Orleans, with his girl and his life, but the parents needed him. Betel needed him, even if he never said or showed it.

He then looked out the door, to his parents that were simple in their ways. Simple people with simple needs. They were wine makers-probably the only reason that Betel stayed around for as long as he did. They made wine, and were damn good at it. Orleans noticed that, for a while at least. That's why they prospered so well in a city so wild, and everyone was happy for a while. Then big companies came in, especially companies of the alcoholic kind, and pushed Mr. and Mrs. Geist out. That was when everything went downhill, especially Betel. He was a big shot in the city of life, but when he learned that he couldn't stay…he made hell. Lots and lots of hell.

Donny sighed as he looked down at Betel. Poor kid. He then watched as Betel came too, and sighed, decking him across the back of his head, knocking him out again. No need to spill tomato juice all over the place.

---

Betel sighed as he stared out the window of the catholic school. All boys school, puh, what a load. He needed chicks, gullible shmucks, and a quick dollar. He needed Orleans, but no, they just had to move. Now he was stuck staring at the back of a boy's head, and ignoring stares of want from iffy boys that were either confused or straight to the point.

He groaned as the bell rang, signaling the end of class. He got up and sighed, walking out the door and to his locker. He waved away a few admirers, and cursed his blond hair and strange scent of tomato juice. Maybe it was an attractant or something. He scrunched his nose; he personally hated the smell. He elbowed his locker, and it popped open. He eyed a paper that popped out of his locker, and drifted down into his hands. He looked it over, flipping it a few times.

"'Circus de Lyondell'?...what the hell?..." he mumbled and looked down the paper. "'Want to get away from your life?' Well ya. 'Want to get what you deserve?' Heh, this paper knows me. 'Then come to Le Circus de Lyondell. Where all your hopes will be fulfilled'… huh…guess it's worth checking out…" he mumbled gruffly and pocketed the advertisement, before flinching at a slap to the rear.

He headed towards his next class, after closing his locker, and looked into a mirror passing bye. He noticed brown where his green should have been. He blinked and looked back, noticing his eyes were green again. He sighed and closed his eyes, when he felt a strong hand on his shoulder. He spun around, into the eyes of Scuzzo. He flinched, then sneered.

"The hell do you want clown?"

He then was shoved against a locker, as four other boys circled around Betel, on both sides of Scuzzo. "Well Well, look what just walked onto our turf boys." The four chuckled ominously.

Betel sneered. "Don't you guys have a hole to crawl into."

"You wish Beetlecrap."

Betel rolled his eyes and pushed Scuzzo away. "Right, well, while you're trying your scare tactics, I'm going to go this way." He started to walk away, when he was shoved again.

"Nu-uh Beetle, we have plans for you." Scuzzo grinned and grabbed Betel. "What do you think boys, should we shave the brat, or maybe cut him up." He said as he pulled out a switch blade. Betel sneered and kicked the knife out of Scuzzo's hand, then kneed him in the throat. Scuzzo kneeled over, gripping his throat and coughing. Betel leapt for the knife, grabbed it, then rolled, standing up and pointing the knife at the boys.

"You rat bastards want a piece of me?" Betel roared and looked at the boys angrily, when they all backed up.

"Mr. Geist!" an authority figure exclaimed, catching Betel's attention. Mr. Shannon, the principle of the catholic school.

Betel stared at him, and then dropped the knife. "Ain't mine."

"Like it isn't. Hurting these poor innocent boys, and cursing in the halls of the lord." He then turned to the boys, and looked at Scuzzo. "Oh, Carol, did the ruffian hurt you?" The boys snickered as Scuzzo glared at the gang. He then looked at Mr. Shannon, and grinned cooly.

"No sir, he didn't. We were just playing a game that got a little out of control."

Mr. Shannon sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Fair enough, but still, there has to be something done about the foul language." He said, ignoring Betel.

Betel grumbled and stuck his hands in his pockets. "Don't ignore me…"

"Right, well, detention for you." Betel stared at Mr. Shannon, like he was crazy. "Detention until dusk. I will call your parents and tell them about the circumstances." Betel grumbled. "and if you miss out on your punishment, Mr. Geist, then there will be severe consequences. Expulsion. That wouldn't look too good on your record, now would it? Being the third school in a row you were kicked out of." Betel glared at the ground, burning holes into it. He glanced at Scuzzo, who was planning his demise behind sweet smirks of innocence. "Be in room 218 after classes are over. I will check to see if you are there myself." He said as he turned to leave, but not before turning to Scuzzo. "Now Carol, have a pleasant day." He said as he left.

Scuzzo grinned and grabbed Betel. In one swoop, Betel was grabbed, lifted over Scuzzo's head, and chucked into a nearby garbage can. Betel groaned and spat a piece of food-whatever it was he didn't want to know- into Scuzzo's face. "Bye bye Carol." Betel spat, and Scuzzo growled in annoyance. He then kicked the can over, and kicked it down the hall.


End file.
